{"product_id":"my-cats-guide-to-online-dating-paperback","title":"My Cat's Guide to Online Dating - Paperback","description":"\u003cp\u003eby \u003cb\u003eChristian Baines\u003c\/b\u003e (Author)\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"The author of \u003cem\u003ePuppet Boy\u003c\/em\u003e this time brings you a gentle romance full of meet-cutes, coffee dates, and talking cats. Sorry, make that a pitch-black sex comedy, with aggressive outdoor hook-ups, unusual tasty treats, and... well, the talking cat bit is true. \u003cem\u003eMy Cat's Guide to Online Dating\u003c\/em\u003e sits somewhere between Gregg Araki for the Grindr generation and what might happen if Dennis Cooper wrote a romcom. Filthy, surreal and darkly funny, you're in for a ride that's going to leave you hungry for flesh in all sorts of unexpected ways.\"- Matthew Bright, author of \u003cem\u003eThe Library of Lost Things\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"One of the most unique books I've read - by turns frightening, hilarious, bizarre, and very, very erotic.\" - Rob Byrnes, author of \u003cem\u003eStraight Lies\u003c\/em\u003e and \u003cem\u003eThe Night We Met\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\"Baines renders the reader complicit with the voracious appetites of his hero Zach and his familiar, Grace Jones. And, at the novel's heart, there beats a steadily mounting horror. Eat this one up!\"\" - James K. Moran, author of \u003cem\u003eFear Itself\u003c\/em\u003e and \u003cem\u003eTown \u0026amp; Train\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"One hell of a ride. Dark, disturbing, and that's just the cat.\"- 'Nathan Burgoine, author of \u003cem\u003eExit Plans for Teenage Freaks\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003eA hook-up gone bad can be purrder.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eFresh from a breakup, deeply closeted freshman Zach jumps at the chance to housesit his family home and enjoy a long, horny summer free of both his ex and his religious parents. But when an old enemy turned hot hook-up falls to his death, Zach turns to the only true friend he's ever known-his cat, Grace Jones. \u003cbr\u003eWith the dead man's phone and a knack for texting, she promises Zach help, for a price that will satisfy both their appetites. Does it matter if Grace Jones' powers draw on something far more ancient and sinister than a cell phone? \u003cbr\u003e\"Get laid, Zachary. Get laid.\" \u003cbr\u003eEach new hook-up brings Zach darkly humorous discoveries about life, love, sex, and his own desires. But Zach knows it's only a matter of time before someone discovers his secret. Can he rely on his feline protector, or is he trapped in a hungry devil's bargain? \u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eChristian Baines \u003c\/strong\u003eis an awkward nerd turned slightly less awkward novelist. His work includes the paranormal series \u003cem\u003eThe Arcadia Trust\u003c\/em\u003e, novella \u003cem\u003eSkin\u003c\/em\u003e, and \u003cem\u003ePuppet Boy\u003c\/em\u003e, a finalist for the 2016 Saints and Sinners Emerging Writer Award. Born in Australia, he now travels the world whenever possible, living, writing, and shivering in Toronto, Canada on the occasions he can't find his passport.\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eNumber of Pages:\u003c\/strong\u003e 328\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/strong\u003e 0.73 x 8.5 x 5.5 IN\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePublication Date:\u003c\/strong\u003e February 18, 2023\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Books by splitShops","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42732955041855,"sku":"9781608642502","price":32.75,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0105\/8226\/1823\/files\/1fd84e0fe550f40a49c2dd43512a791d.webp?v=1765134251","url":"https:\/\/dhlswag.com\/products\/my-cats-guide-to-online-dating-paperback","provider":"BBB","version":"1.0","type":"link"}